By Carol Wilson
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Additional resources for Best Practice in Performance Coaching: A Handbook for Leaders, Coaches, HR Professionals and Organizations
Coachee Yes – I feel I have all the right qualities and talents for this job. I get great feedback too. And my six-monthly reviews are always good. 1 continued Coach You sound confident that you are good enough. R Coachee Yes, I am. Coach Are there any grounds for believing that other people don’t think you’re good enough? Coachee No, I suppose there aren’t. Coach What would it be like if you knew that everyone regarded you highly? Coachee Fabulous. I could get so much done. Coach Coachee What is the impact of feeling that people think you aren’t good enough?
Those habit patterns are recurring, and however much you hate the behaviour, you are likely to repeat it. Through processes of self-examination, such as coaching or therapy, you do not eliminate these hindrances but it is possible to become aware of your tendencies and to manage them. So if I become aware of the fact that I am grumpy in the morning, I will be careful to monitor myself, perhaps noticing that if I have a coffee first I won’t be grumpy. Once I become aware of something about myself, I can start to manage it.
During the training he realized that he had never really listened to another person in his life before. Listening at the lower levels in everyday life is not necessarily a bad thing, but on the whole it is not coaching. Coaches listen at Levels Four and Five, ideally throughout every session. It sounds like hard work, but is in fact quite stimulating and energizing, rather like being in a game of chess where you are enthralled by calculating the next move. 22 FUNDAMENTALS QUESTIONING Another activity at which coaches spend a large proportion of their time is asking questions, but not the type of questions we ask in everyday life.